Long distance relationship

I went to Turkey for love. Before falling in love with a Turkish boy, I was not even sure if I know where exactly Turkey was. But Turkey came into my life suddenly, sweeping me from my feet like a strong wave and considerately changing me. At first EVS was just a way to be there. It was a way to discover the world. It was a way to do something in a different way. It was an option to leave the routine behind me. It was an opportunity to change the environment, food, language, symbols, clothes, makeup and behavior. I didn’t know it would change me eventually into quite different person.

Time is a part of the measuring system used to sequence events, to compare the durations of events and the intervals between them.

I knew I would be in my EVS for a long time, one year, in a small city relatively close to the Aegean Sea. The city was sweet, but a bit too small for my taste. I thought I would stay in Turkey forever, I took my time adapting to my first impressions and steps in Turkish land. Now I think I was a fool taking everything slowly, time passed too quickly and I missed too many seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks and months of precious EVS time. But I didn’t know how precious EVS time was back then. The main idea of EVS is to work in a social sphere and give your time to the ones who need it. The idea of EVS is investment of time, not direct money in people around you so that you could share the same time in spite of different backgrounds and curriculum vitae. Time in a Baltic region and time near Middle East are two different concepts. Baltic region’s time is for running, doing your thousands errands in one day, correcting mistakes, planning and wishing you had one more day to compete your work. Turkish time is timeless; there are no limits and units of time. “Five minutes later” can mean “five months later”. Turkish time was for enjoying days of no hurry, no stress, and no agenda. But the real trick was to find a compromise between two different time systems for me.

Wind of change

So in 2008 I was living in a different world, grasping new ideas and pictures, interesting conversations time by time, trying to memorize some moments and keeping them alive in my blog. I felt so close to writing back than, I felt creative. I let all impressions, little details about the differences between my county and Turkey pour into entries of seemingly insignificant blog I was keeping alive for years. Sometimes I read those entries and miss the feeling I had when I used to write- every day of my EVS life felt like I am so important, significant, interesting person. Every day was a small episode from Discovery Channel. Every day was a little lecture on the diplomacy between many nations and races; every day was a workshop for intercultural dialogue. Every day was a reality show.

I was far away from my comfort zone, I was expanding it, trying to learn Turkish language which was so much different than any language I had heard before. So first I had to learn the structure and open the package that comes with Turkish language just to get inside of this strangely attractive language. Sometimes I felt like an engineer, trying to find an innovative way how to get through some difficult situations, how to adapt, how not to get homesick too much, how to find a way to communicate in one language if most of the people cannot understand each other verbally. But we did understand each other eventually.

“I’m your biggest fan, I’ll follow you until you love me, Papa-paparazzi”..

Then I got to the point that EVS is a way to understand the feelings of celebrity in a room full of photographers and flashlights. EVS and Turkey spoiled me little bit with attention. I was so much more interesting person to them than the „real me” in Latvia – my hair, my nose, my „colorful” eyes as they used to call them, my accent, my origins, my parents and their income level, my ring, my marital status, my height, my weight, the changes in my body and mood, my ideas, my freedom- it was all a matter of mass interest. Wherever I went, I felt noticed. Sometimes I was also followed. But usually I was fed by old ladies in the bus, I was holding screaming babies of strangers, I was given ten thousands instructions how to get to the train station and finally taken in a car of somebody’s cousin to get me to the train in time. I was told the intimate details of their lives on the main streets of Istanbul, I was photographed by strangers and asked about Latvia so much that at some points I thought I can work in Latvia’s embassy as a representative person.

As for a comfort zone…

I totally changed the size of it. Suddenly things were more flexible. Things started to change around me. There were fewer limits. I could take a microphone in my hand and stand in front of more than fifty people and speak in English like I had done that before EVS so many times in my life, like I was not deadly scared to speak up in front of audience in Latvia. The fear disappeared. I got free from stereotypes. I ignored stereotypes. I made my own stereotypes. Everybody talked about economic crisis but I felt like I am in a Disney movie, I never felt so safe in my life as in Turkey. I got to know the people who changed me, or probably they just showed some parts of me I was hiding beneath some social codes and rules. I want to think I also changed somebody at least little bit – the students I was teaching English in my EVS project and telling them how great opportunity EVS is, also that guy I spoke once near the market for nearly an hour, the girl who wanted to become a journalist but was afraid to resist her parents will who said it is not a profession for a girl.

I came to Turkey for a love, but as a couple I and my Turkish boy did not make it till the end of my EVS. But I left Turkey with a bigger love. I fell in love with Turkey. I came back as a better person; I was sure what I want from my life. And although we have a long distance relationship with Turkey now, I still see my EVS life in dreams. I take the same bus B5 to get home from university, I walk the same streets, I smell freshly baked bread simit and I smile to people on the streets I barely know. It’s the most perfect relationship in my life, me and Turkey, we understand each other, and still she is always there for me.

by Santa Jana, Latvia